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All The Kwame Sex Texts You Can Handle!
Those steamy texts, exchanged by former Detroit mayor Kwame Kilpatrick and his girlfriend Christine Beatty, have been released, as prosecutors develop possible perjury cases against the two.
You can pore over them here.
And since there are 6000 of them ... if you want to help us out, tell us about the most interesting ones in comments, or by emailing the talk address.
Happy hunting!
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Josh
Zachary
Having smoothies?
March 10, 2009 4:20 PM | Reply | Permalink
A note from the grammar police:
You don't "pour" through messages unless you really want to get them all went.
You pore over stuff. Not pour.
March 10, 2009 4:50 PM | Reply | Permalink
wet, not went. sorry.
March 10, 2009 4:50 PM | Reply | Permalink
you're right, snarky. thanks, i'll change.
March 10, 2009 5:13 PM | Reply | Permalink
Pretty much sums the whole situation up.
March 10, 2009 5:16 PM | Reply | Permalink
Nauseating levels of LOLs.
March 10, 2009 5:21 PM | Reply | Permalink
Surely this is covered ground, but color me newbie: with consecutive LOLOL-etc.'s, does it stand for "laughing out laughing out loud" or rather "laughing out loud out loud"?
And why do men have nipples?
March 10, 2009 5:41 PM | Reply | Permalink
ugh, all those PDFs. no time today.
March 10, 2009 5:32 PM | Reply | Permalink
I have a bookmark file titled "Weird Shit" Guess I'll put the texts there. God, how can people be so stupid?
March 11, 2009 10:54 AM | Reply | Permalink
"LOL. NOPE, TOO MANY WHITE PEOPLE! TOO MANY QUESTIONS." -THE MAYOR
What's with the all CAPS?!
page 519 of 682
March 10, 2009 5:44 PM | Reply | Permalink
10:26 7/22
CLB - Have you left?
10:29 7/22
The Mayor - I'm getting a haircut. coming right after.
10:29 7/22
CLB - What? I'm staying here in this house myself with nothing in it just sitting here. You said 10:30. What's up?
10:33
The Mayor - Nigga, I'll be there in 25mins. I'm Sorry.
10:37
CLB - Man I'm gone. Call me when you leave. I'm not sitting in here for 45min just lookin at the walls. I've been here since 10:20.
10:42
The Mayor - Ok, I'll call you in a few. I wait on you when you are late too. LOL I know how you feel.
10:47
CLB - Whatever nigga. You have never had to wait for me at no vacant ass house with nothing in it just looking at the walls!
10:47
CLB - How long? Are you done?
10:48
The Mayor - Will arrive 15m
10:49
The Mayor - Its Love in that house. I felt it.
10:54
CLB - You almost here?
11:01
The Mayor - Will arrive 5m
11:01
CLB - Come on man. How much longer? Should I just go home
11:04
CLB - Come to the side.
11:05
The Mayor - OK!
March 10, 2009 5:55 PM | Reply | Permalink
that's creepy. I hope no one ever gets a hold of your txts and published them for fun
March 10, 2009 5:59 PM | Reply | Permalink
Fun? Schadenfreude, maybe, but fun? Call it what you want, but keeping government clean is no Carnival Cruise.
March 10, 2009 6:02 PM | Reply | Permalink
this post has nothing to do with keeping government clean. it's just giggling at the gizz spots on the wall like 14 year old boys, or peaking at someone's underwear without permission
March 10, 2009 6:05 PM | Reply | Permalink
Hahah this whole thing is great, I wish I had the time to go though it all.
pg 532 "Mr Mayor, the meeting went okay as long as you subscribe to the JO theory that White people are behind this. We meet again tomorrow am and I meet with Duggan this evening after part 2 of the Misty chronicles (in Sean’s ofc) Chris’ faith in herself is a bit shaken. Unfortunately JO’s isn’t! Peace, Ruther (10/23 04:09PM EDT)"
March 10, 2009 6:03 PM | Reply | Permalink
then again, maybe you think it's funny to read through all those messages because your txts and relationships just have no pizazz...
"honey, I'll pick up milk on the way home, then after dinner we can watch american idol together. k? "
March 10, 2009 6:03 PM | Reply | Permalink
these folks were plotting the destruction of their families and marriages on the govt. dime. Using govt. transportation and taxpayer gas for their nookie sessions. I hope my texts and emails are never so 'pizazzy'
March 10, 2009 6:35 PM | Reply | Permalink
huh, funny, as I didn't read anything about corruption in that long passage you quoted above or below. is that why you quoted those passages, because each one was proved a specific instance of corruption?
or is throwing out "corruption" now just how you justify what you're doing here, by saying they are bad people so you have the right to sift through personal messages, giggling all the way?
maybe if your txts were a little juicier you'd understand, and these here would lose their prurient interest to you
March 10, 2009 7:22 PM | Reply | Permalink
I think you got your comment attached to the wrong author. I never mentioned corruption. I read thru only the last pdf of their texts....they were constantly plotting how to dump their spouses and detach him from his family. And they were doing it on Taxpayer time, on Taxpayer phones, using Taxpayer transportation to make his booty calls.
I never mentioned "corruption" once.
Tell me, what is the upside? What is it you find so edifying about what they were doing? Why do you think they deserve no scrutiny?
If you are going to criticize me, you might want start by being intelligible and addressing my points. You're basically sifting through their stuff grumbling all the way. I wasn't giggling, I was fairly appalled.
March 10, 2009 9:51 PM | Reply | Permalink
kind of disingenuous of you to claim there's no giggling on your part and then to look one comment down and see the "MY N" quote you pulled
I used corruption as a summary of your point. it was shorthand for bilking taxpayers, etc. to me, that's corruption, and I'm in no way defending it
what you don't seem to get is that what they did can be wrong/publicly corrupt/whatever AND AT THE SAME TIME it can still be creepy for people to find so much fun in digging through their sexual communications, as TPM still seems to enjoy as they again hype a contest about it all on their front page today.
March 12, 2009 4:33 PM | Reply | Permalink
check page 651 of 682
starting around, oh I don't know, SPREAD YO HUSTLE MY NIGGA
March 10, 2009 6:06 PM | Reply | Permalink
On page 461, The Mayor discusses his preferences in hairstyles. (He prefers naked).
March 10, 2009 6:12 PM | Reply | Permalink
6/23/2002
23:16
(p4 of 682)
ERASE. Right. : )
(breaks added for emphasis)
March 10, 2009 6:17 PM | Reply | Permalink
8-30-2004
5:25PM
Mayor Kilpatrick - CAN I GET SOME SUGAR LATER?
5:36
CLB - NO QUESTION!!!
5:37
Mayor Kilpatrick - THANK YOU MAM!
5:39
CLB - CAN'T WAIT.
5:43
Mayor Kilpatrick - ME NEITHER!
8:09
Mayor Kilpatrick - I'm GOING TO YOUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW.
March 10, 2009 6:19 PM | Reply | Permalink
Page 661
Reply from THE MAOR is LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL (09/08 11:46AM EDT)
Reply from Christine Beatty is Ok, thik of something and get back to me (09/08 11:47 EDT
Reply from THE MAYOR is You TOLD ME. Ok, I SOLD WEED IN COLLEGE! (09/08 11:56 EDT)
Reply from Christine Beatty is WHHHHAAAAATTTT! THAT’S A GOOD ONE!! (09/08 11:58 AM EDT)
Reply from THE MAYOR is LOLOLOLOL! YEP! ME AND TIM (09/08 12:01 PM EDT)
Reply from Christine Beatty is You ole gansta ass nigga! (09/08 12:02 PM EDT)
March 10, 2009 6:49 PM | Reply | Permalink
I got to page 3 and had to stop. There was this:
I see why the sexy texts were the thing that broke this case wide open. Forget the dead stripper, this kind of crap is the real crime.
Just a bit further down the same page...
You couldn't make this stuff up.
March 10, 2009 10:44 PM | Reply | Permalink
I like the one where Beatty says "tell me something I don't already know about you". Kilpatrick responds "I sold weed on college".
March 11, 2009 12:49 PM | Reply | Permalink
Ruined lives, ruined careers, public trust destroyed (if there was any in Michigan before this)over not using a friggin personal account for this bullshit?
Idiots.
"I SOLD WEED IN COLLEGE!" wow smh
Schadenfreude indeed. This is nothing but mangled limbs hanging out of a burning Datsun B210.
March 12, 2009 1:35 PM | Reply | Permalink
Christine Beatty: I just got buck naked, took a shower and got out looking for a robe (listening to you and just assuming there is one) and there isn't one! LOLOL. I guess it's just me and the sheets tonight! (11/08 01:19AM EST)
Kilpatrick: DAMN! I REALLY WISH I WAS THER. EVEN MORE NOW. LOL! ENJOY YOUR NIGHT. I'm SO JEALOUS OF THE SHEETS. (11/08 01:21AM EST)
--
Christine Beatty: Hey, would you be mad if I found another man/husband between now and sometime in the next two years? Lou Beatty and I might not make it and I need to find a new husband! (06/10 08:28PM EDT)
Kilpatrick: I WOULD BE MAD AS HELL! STAY WITH LOU. I CAN'T TAKE ANOTHER DUDE. (06/10 8:50PM EDT)
March 12, 2009 2:33 PM | Reply | Permalink
Not exactly the guy I want as the face of my city. You know it's not a good sign for the dude when one of his "best" texts were "I sold weed in college." I'll give anyone 1000:1 odds that he will not be a mayor again....takers??
March 12, 2009 5:00 PM | Reply | Permalink
Now on the personal! You are the most phenomenal
woman I have known, outside my Mom. I and many more know you are one of a kind I tbc MAYOR
KILPATRICK (05/26 02:32PM EDT)
pg.278
March 12, 2009 6:22 PM | Reply | Permalink
That's why I know WE are not a mistake or coincidence. GOD put
us together. We are better together. We still have many things to work on indiVidually. (05/26
03:30PM EDT)
pg280
from THE MAYOR is I'm touching you tomorrow. Just thought I'd give you the heads up!
(05/26 09:09PM EDT
That was truly a wonderful experience! You bring me JOY! Sleep well! Today is the 1st day of the rest
of our lives. MAYOR KILPATRICK (05/27 01 :30AM EDT)
pg 281
THE MAYOR is Happy Birthday Baby! Old Ass. Have a good one. GOD did something
amazing when he made you!!!
pg.284
THE MAYOR is I know its an Emotional time. Trust me, I KNOW! Do what makes you feel
good. I need you more for the Marathon, than the sprint. Enjoy your Birthday! Tbc (05/29 11 :29AM
Christine Beatty is I need to first say that I AM DOWN WITH YOU FOREVER IN THIS
LIFE THING! Then I need you to know that. It's emotional right now on several levels of my life. I AM
TRYING SO HARD TO GET THICKER SKIN REALLY QUICK!:) tbc (05/2911 :11AM CDT)
You seem to be "frownin9 up at me lately about everything and
anything I say and that is difficult for me. I'm sorry. It seems as though you aren't confident in a lot of
my basic decision making abilites or if I ask a question, you assume the worst or the negative in the
intent of the of the question.
Again I say, I am trying to get better by the minute. If I am questioning
or challenging you too mUCh, I'm certainly not trying to and I will work harder on being quiet. tbe
Christine Beatty is Last msg! On a personal note, you seemed so distant when you came
to wish me happy birthday and that was hard. I know you are focused and the last thing I want to be is
the person to take you off focus. I had my needy session on monday and I didn't want to dump any
more of my emotional crap on you. (05/29 11:41AM CDT
pg.286
Reply from THE MAYOR is I know that's how you feel. I knew you would feel like that. That is a pt of
needing 100% approval for everything! MY APPROVAL! Stop Frowning. The only way we get better is
that everyone needs to honestly assess themselves. Tbc (05/29 02:02PM EDT)
THE MAYOR is Its incredibly hard for us to have the BosslEmp relationship right now. It
seems harsh, distant and sometimes unfair. But that's the only way we can honestly assess the Org. I
have complete confidence in you and your ability... tbc (05/29 02:05PM EDT)
MAYOR is this has nothin to do with lack of Confidence. And, its NOT ALL ABOUT
YOU! We have to continue to change, move, plan, strategize and manage what comes at us. You
playa HUGE role in that. But Chris, its not ALL you or your responsibility. Tbc (05/29 02: 11 PM EDT)
THE MAYOR is Just BE YOURSELF! And know that even that can piss me and others off
sometimes. Work on you. Expanding your reach, learn from your mistakes, plan your next move, be
in charge and BE CONFIDENT! Tbc (05/29 02:16PM EDT)
Don't get MAD. Just think about this. You have been given too mUCh, seen too much, done too much
to FEEL SORRY FOR YOURSELF! LET THAT SHIT GO! You are the shit. Sometimes you are real
Nerve reeking. (SMILE) BUT, I love and need you. LET'S MOVE!I! MAYOR KILPATRICK (05/29
02:19PM EDT)
pg.287-288
March 12, 2009 6:35 PM | Reply | Permalink
I'm going to dream about your tongue allover my clitoris and then you penetrating me deep inside.
And being wet at slightest touch of your hand. PAYBACK! AND ERASE! :) Christine L. Beatty
(10105 10:12PM EDT)
THE MAYOR is DAMN! LOL LOL LOL LOL. That's FUCKED UP. YOU GOT ME.
LOVELY THOUGHT THOUGH
pg.39
Christine Beatty is I really wanted to give you some good head this morning and I didn't
know how to ask you to let me me do it. I have wanted to since Friday night when you asked me at
the club. (09/15 09:42AM EDT
pg.33
THE MAYOR is EVERYTHING IS COOL. DID YOU GET BUSTED? YOU WERE KIND
OF WET LAST NIGHT, INSIDE AND OUT. LOL (09/09 09:14AM EDT)
pg.26
Love like yours is heaven sent. Each day a day to remember. ! feel so safe, I feel secure with you,
with you. Give me love, keep right on giving. Feel me up, baby with the joy of living. When things get
tough, I can always turn to you, YOU'RE MY ANGELI ANITA BAKER 1988. Christine L. Beatty
THE MAYOR is THANK YOU FOR LETTING ME IN. IT TOOK 10YRS, BUT I AM VERY
HAPPY TO BE HERE. (09/02 03:20AM EDT
pg.24
THE MAYOR is YES. ON MY WAY NOW. YOU LOOK SO DAMN GOODI I LIKE YOUI
WILL YOU GO WITH ME? (08/22 08:22PM EDT)
Reply from Christine Beatty is LOL. I ALREADY HAVE A BOYFRIEND AND I REALLY, REALLY
LIKE HIM A lot! I DON'T THINK I CAN LET HIM GO! CALL ME BEFORE YOU LEAVE THE
OFFICE. (08/22 08:27PM EDT)
Reply from THE MAYOR is OK! SO THIS TIME YOU HAVE TO CHECK WITH HIM!!I DAMN! LOL
LOL LOll THAT SHIT WAS FUNNY! (08/22 08:30PM EDT) to LOL.
Reply from Christine Beatty is LOll NOPE I DON'T HAVE TO CHECK WITH HIM AT ALLI HE
KNOWS I'M NOT GOING ANYWHERE! THERE'S NOTHING TO CHECK WITH HIM ON BECAUSE
HE HAS ME WHIPPED! (DAMN THAT WAS GOOD) LOL. (08/22 08:33PM EDT)
pg.18
I wanted you to I thought
about what said last night about me "being a little freaky" and that I enjoyed it What I will say is that
dispite having inhibitions, I look forward to exploring anything new with you and making you feel good.
YOU have my heart and soul and I could only imagine exploring such worlds with you. Christine L
Beatty Christine L. Beatty (12/12 07:51PM EST)
THE MAYOR is THAT MESSAGE WAS THE SHIT!!! THANK YOU SOOOOO MUCH.
THE MAYOR is I'm BLOWN AWAY BY THAT MESSAGE. (12/12 08:04PM EST)
from Christine Beatty is LOL Didn't you already know that in your heart?
pg.57
THE MAYOR is HELL YEAH I KNEW IT. I'm JUST SOOOO SURPRISE TO HEAR YOU
SAY IT. (12/12 08:15PM EST)
from Christine Beatty is LOL. Don't expect me to start masterbating as we speak! LOLOL! I
just wanted you to know how much I love lOVing you and I wanted you to know how much trust I do
have in our intimate relationship. I know that you would never force me into anything that I didn't want
to do, and that if I am uncomfortable, you would never pressure me. I probably could have only
articulated that first message over th (12/12 08:30PM EST)
Reply from THE MAYOR is LOLOLOLOL! THAT SHIT IS ON YOUR MIND. You Are MY G! I WANT
You TO FEEL COMFORTABLE AND LOVED ALL THE TIME
THE MAYOR is I PUT NIGGAS OUT FOR You! LOLOL. ESPECIALLY TO SEE What's
NEW AROUND THE THAIYAA! (01/07 06:09PM EST)
Reply from Christine Beatty is DANG! TELL ME AGAIN WHAT MAKES IT THAIYAA. IN NEED TO
MAKE SURE I PRESERVE WHAEVER IT IS IF I GET THAT RESPONSE! LOU (01/07 06:15PM
EST
THE MAYOR is Can't EXPLAIN, JUST IS. WHEN I'm INSIDE, THERE IS NOWHERE I
WOULD RATHER BE. "HEAVEN MUST BE LIKE THIS, IT MUST BE LIKE THIS" (01/07 06:18PM
EST
pg 66
Reply from Christine Beatty is Just in case you don't know, you are the "love of my life". I could have
never ima9ined in my wildest dreams that I would love this hard and this deep. What is even more
amazin9 is I can remember the beginning of growing these feelings for you. I have loved you this way
my whole life and it has come to full realization. Thank you for loving me. No resp needed. (01/16
09:40PM EST)
THE MAYOR is WOW! (01/16 09:42PM EST)
Reply from Christine Beatty is LOL. I hope that is not surprising to you. I hope I'm able to show you
that in everything I do. (01/16 09:46PM EST
Reply from THE MAYOR is I KNOW IT WITH ALL MY SOUL. (01/16 09:56PM EST
THE MAYOR is YEAH! I ALWAYS KNEW SINCE 1988 You WOULD BE THE WOMAN I
WOULD CARRY ACROSS THE THRESHOLD. I STILL KNOW THAT! (01/19 06:19PM EST)
pg 68
and then there is the OTHER women besides Christine
natashiadooley@hotmail.com· -D IV-GIrlfrlend
said that you can watch. She aiso said that she can't stop thinking about me. Do you want to make
this happen?
THE MAYOR is YEP. PUT IT TOGETHER
pg.69
hhhhhmmmm A little menage a trois? maybe
Reply from THE MAYOR is STOP! I ALWAYS THOUGHT THAT IS WHAT TRUE LOVE MEANT.
TWO PEOPLE LOSING THEMSELVES SOMEWHAT, BUT TOGETHER THEY ARE MUCH
STRONGER I'm SCARED BECAUSE ITS NEW TERRITORY FOR ME. NOT ONLY TO GIVE ALL
YOUR LOVE, BUT ALSO TO RECEIVE ALL OF YOURS...TBC (02110 11:24PM EST) ITS NOT A FEAR THAT I WANT TO RUN FROM, BUT ONE I WANT TO ENJOY OVERCOMING.
"LOVE ISN'T LOVE, TILL YOU'VE GIVEN IT AWAY" THANK YOU FOR GIVING ME YOUR LOVE.
MAYOR KILPATRICK (02/10 11:28PM EST
pg.86
Did you know that I love you like they protray It In the movies? The kind of love that lasts through
Reply from THE MAYOR is Yes I did! Nobo,dy has ever loved me like you do. I don't think anyone
ever will. Just know that I love you like that too. (02/20 11 :48PM EST)
Reply from Chiistlne Beatty Is I do. This Is another question unrelated to the last. Have you and your
wife been back on a regular sex life? (02/20 11:51PM EST)
THE MAYOR Is We had sex 1 time this year. Not regular at all. (02120 11 :53PM EST
A love like yours Is rare, it must have been sent from up above. Atlantic 5tarr-1985 MAYOR
KILPATRICK (02/20 11:54PM EST)
Reply from Christine Beatty is I'm just asking in comparison to mine. Lou and I have not had sex
since last year and I still think about it everytime you ask me if it's your's and it really is LOL. I have
one more thing if you are still up. (02/20 11 :57PM EST
Reply from Christine Beatty is LOll Whatever! This wasn't the question, but do you feel like it's
your's? (02121 12:01AM EST)
Reply from THE MAYOR is I Do! I really do. I feel that it was made for me! What's the other Q.
(02121 12:03AM EST
Reply from Christine Beatty is My last question or observation is that we have been more intense with
each other since our Saturday night date and I have been feeling so good since then. What does that
mean for us? What are we going to ever do wlo this aspect of our relationship
Reply from THE MAYOR is Shit! You might as well asked me "What's the meaning of life". Shit, I
don't know what we would do. Alii know is you are the best ever. Mentally, Spiritually and yes
Physically. EVER!!! (02/21 12:13AM EST
How are you today? Miss you already! Had a bad dream last nighLthat you had a girlfriend. So of
course I woke up pissed! Carlita E. Kilpatrick (02/24 05:47PM EST)
pg92-93
His wife's dreams are on target hahahaha
anything. Christine L. Beatty (02/20 11 :46PM EST)
March 12, 2009 7:22 PM | Reply | Permalink
fucking incredible.
March 14, 2009 3:47 PM | Reply | Permalink