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Today's Must Read
OK, so you knew Duke Cunningham was dirty, but you didn't know that he was this dirty.
The Wrong Stuff: The Extraordinary Saga of Randy “Duke” Cunningham, the Most Corrupt Congressman Ever Caught, the book about Cunningham by the reporters who brought him down, hits stores this coming Monday. We here at TPM were lucky enough to get an advance copy and have been tearing through it.
The book is the Cunningham scandal from A to Z -- following from Duke's childhood to his guilty plea, and following the (alleged) bribes from Brent Wilkes' or Mitchell Wade's pocket to the harassed contracting officer in the Pentagon who was to make sure that the contractors got their money. And the book is bursting with details, a number of them new and unforgettable.
Take, for instance, the following scene aboard Duke's yacht, the Duke-Stir. It has a way of seizing hold of your imagination and not letting go, no matter how very, very hard you try:
...even Wilkes drew a line on what he would do for the congressman. For one thing, Wilkes was totally disgusted by the hot tub Cunningham put on the boat's deck during the autumn and winter. What repelled Wilkes -- and others invited to the parties -- was both the water Cunningham put in the hot tub and the congressman's penchant for using it while naked, even if everybody else at the party was clothed. Cunningham used water siphoned directly from the polluted Potomac River and never changed it out during the season. "Wilkes thought it was unbelievably dirty and joked if you got in there it would leave a dark water line on your chest," said one person familiar with the parties. "The water was so gross that very few people were willing to get into the hot tub other than Duke and his paramour." That was a reference to Cunningham's most frequently seen girlfriend, a flight attendant who lived in Maryland.One of these parties started at the Capital Grille with Cunningham ordering his usual filet mignon -- very well done -- with iceberg lettuce salad and White Oak. Wilkes used the dinner to update Cunningham on the appropriations he wanted. Cunningham then took the whole group back to the boat where they drank more wine, sitting on white leather sofas while Cunningham told more war stories. Cunningham then took his clothes off and invited all to join him in the polluted hot tub that was hidden from the neighbors by a white tarp. There were no takers.
You can read an interview with Marcus Stern, one of the book's authors, here.
Comments (95)
DFD wrote on May 22, 2007 9:54 AM:*gag*
Brent wrote on May 22, 2007 9:55 AM:Sorry, can't help it. My security code is "sticky". Just too ironic to let pass.
idea wrote on May 22, 2007 9:55 AM:There are some things that are just better off not repeated. That excerpt was one of them....
Buckethead wrote on May 22, 2007 9:56 AM:Cunningham ordering his usual filet mignon -- very well done
Does his depravity know no bounds?!
BC wrote on May 22, 2007 9:57 AM:Could there be a more fitting metaphor? A cesspool, into which, noboby in their right mind wants to imerse.
Pissed Off American wrote on May 22, 2007 9:59 AM:You oughta get thirty years for ordering a Filet Mignon very well done.
chuck wrote on May 22, 2007 10:00 AM:Somehow, this totally fits Duke Cunningham - a hot tub that's actually a cesspool. The metaphor to his public service is inescapable.
Delia wrote on May 22, 2007 10:01 AM:Yuck. I haven't had breakfast yet.
Did this bozo think he was so powerful he was immune to pollution as well?
nolo wrote on May 22, 2007 10:03 AM:sorry -- i just threw up
in my mouth a little bit.
that was nasty.
stank-butt nasty -- like the
davcbr wrote on May 22, 2007 10:04 AM:man -- just like the machine he ran. . .
You want your meats thoroughly cooked these days it seems... you know, there are all sorts of bugs you could get from tainted meat.
dc
code: snake; no further comment.
Beth wrote on May 22, 2007 10:05 AM:Maybe we should be relieved that the Dukester didn't order A-1 steak sauce with his well done filet mignon. But seriously, people who abuse quality steak like that should not be allowed to associate with civilized people.
Duckman GR wrote on May 22, 2007 10:11 AM:Well done Filet Mignon and Iceburg Lettuce, how daring, and it really does show the character of the man. Parochial, closed minded, repressed.
When I go out to dinner, we often go to the same place, but i never order the same thing over and over, what's the point of that? You eat out to try somebody elses menu, otherwise you might as well just put everything into a blender and drink it down since it's all going to the same place.
Obviously taste is not a concern, since shoe leather and water aren't the most robust of flavors.
TheraP wrote on May 22, 2007 10:15 AM:Another "nail" in the coffin of how the right wing exists to "do good."
won wrote on May 22, 2007 10:16 AM:10am...delia..have a bowl of cereal for chrissakes
Steven Jong wrote on May 22, 2007 10:18 AM:Surely this anecdote ended with the Duke emerging from his hot tub/cesspool, sauntering over to the white leather couch and sitting down for conversation, and then leaving a stain when he got up?
G4AM wrote on May 22, 2007 10:22 AM:code = waste, What a waste of polluted water.
MasonMcD wrote on May 22, 2007 10:23 AM:You want your meats thoroughly cooked these days it seems... you know, there are all sorts of bugs you could get from tainted meat.
That's only true of ground meat. Steak only has it's outer surface exposed to nasty bugs.
Sear the outside, enjoy the red center. You won't get sick. Unless there's some loose prion from BSE in there.
mark wrote on May 22, 2007 10:23 AM:I understand that the dirty water plays as a rhetorical allegory, and not to take away from the disgusting mental picture that is Cunningham naked in filth, but the water in the Potomac has actually been cleaned up over the years. Sure, some 70% of Potomac river catfish caught have liver-tumors (the sediment is essentially a brownfield), but the water above G'Town is not that bad, really. People swim in it everyday.
SC= Brain, as in you have one of your own, so use it.
Terp wrote on May 22, 2007 10:23 AM:I'm not sure I'd call the Potomac 'polluted.' It isn't the cleanest river in the world, but you can swim in it. And it is the source for my drinking water here in Northern Virginia. But it is kind of gross to fill a hot tub with it. I bet it foamed up nicely. Yuk.
Marshall wrote on May 22, 2007 10:29 AM:Actually, this puts the Duke in a more favorable light, I think. I tend to think well of those who swim in mildly polluted water of rivers that most people shun--the Hudson is one of my favorite swimming destinations.
That said, getting in naked with guests is slightly off. As is not changing the water.
Glenn wrote on May 22, 2007 10:31 AM:I'm more concerned about the effect ON the Potomac of recirculating water that Duke and his Skank-Du-Jour have been steeping in. Even Bush's EPA would have to be concerned about that.
John Dillinger wrote on May 22, 2007 10:39 AM:Does the book contain any pics of the bimbos?
ckerst wrote on May 22, 2007 10:41 AM:I have to agree ordering filet mignon well done is beastly. Only one of extremely low character would do so.
DG wrote on May 22, 2007 10:41 AM:This is great stuff. Washington eats these juicy tidbits like...filet mingon.
just john wrote on May 22, 2007 10:43 AM:That ain't just water, it's DUKE SOUP!
("Go, and never darken my towels again!" -- Rufus T. Firefly)
uncle vester wrote on May 22, 2007 10:44 AM:Mr Yuck says,
Yuck!
Were they drinking red wine on the white leather sofas? Was the carpet white as well? I guess he thought "I'm rich now, I can run around nekkid on the boat if I want to".
ww wrote on May 22, 2007 10:48 AM:Associated Press - Polluted Potomac linked to 'intersex' fish - January 20, 2007
http://www.potomacwaterwatch.org/
Dan D wrote on May 22, 2007 10:48 AM:He probably had white wine with that ruined filet, troglodyte that he is.
Nina Katarina wrote on May 22, 2007 10:50 AM:Your redirect from TPM was absolutely wrong.
I did want to miss that.
Yuck.
jeffgee wrote on May 22, 2007 10:51 AM:Jon Stewart, are you reading this? Could be good for a laugh
Freshwind wrote on May 22, 2007 10:54 AM:So he filled his hot tub with putrid water? Imagine how vile it must have been after he had immersed his iniquitous carcass in it numerous times. And then he likely put it back in the Potomac, right? Pity the poor fish!
Bill wrote on May 22, 2007 10:59 AM:People burn in hell for all eternity for doing stuff like that to a filet mignon.
sailor wrote on May 22, 2007 11:02 AM:And this asshole was supposed to have been an "officer and a gentleman"?
SteinL wrote on May 22, 2007 11:10 AM:Meet and greet with your elected officials now includes tubbing in dirty river water? Ah, the class displayed boggles the mind.
My security code for this was "right" - the tech must be using ESP today.
WaterBabe wrote on May 22, 2007 11:11 AM:Please, someone, find out which airline that flight attendant works for so I can never fly it:
Ehhhh! She (assuming it's a "she") might be serving me a drink, and spitting in it first.
SteinL wrote on May 22, 2007 11:11 AM:OK. This is childish. But the security code now is "boat", and it's simply too precious to pass up. Please forgive me!
Chico wrote on May 22, 2007 11:18 AM:That ain't just water, it's DUKE SOUP!
Why a Duke? Why-a no chickenhawk?
DanF wrote on May 22, 2007 11:24 AM:OK ... My security code is, I swear, "meat".
Burnt fillet mignon on iceberg lettuce ... Class act.
Leta wrote on May 22, 2007 11:24 AM:White Oak - guys $180 bucks a bottle easy
Beth wrote on May 22, 2007 11:30 AM:Leta, frankly ordering a $180 bottle of wine to wash down your well done filet mignon is so beyond tacky. And I thought Navy pilots had class. My bad.
scott wrote on May 22, 2007 11:40 AM:I'll stick up for the Duke on one thing...for health reasons, if you're going to eat red meat, it's much healthier to get it well done (or very well done) than rare.
We wouldn't want Duke getting heart disease prematurely, would we? This guy's a fountain of material.
Barry Freed wrote on May 22, 2007 11:51 AM:Well Paul, your next assignment is to determine whether or not there were any floaters in there. The American people have a right to know!
Security code: goat as in "this is grosser than goatse"
osama_been_forgotten wrote on May 22, 2007 11:55 AM:I only eat my beef well-done during Republican Administrations. During Democratic Administrations, I trust the FDA to do their inspections properly.
Austin Cooper wrote on May 22, 2007 11:57 AM:Cunningham's behavior is simply a trailer-trash perspective on what the trappings of 'success' and 'livin' big' could be.
It's an image of a person without class, taste or sensibility -- only "appetites".
This isn't to say that if Cunningham had possessed more 'refinement', his corruption would have been excusable. But it's a logical extension of the "YAAA-hoo!" Bush world -- lowlifes who live in mansions. It's a wonder Duke didn't sport 'Bling' jewelry.
Maybe Duke can get some Elvis-On-Velvet paintings for the wall of his cell. Or a fuzzy seat cover for the right-out-in-front-of-God-and-man toilet.
Pathetic.
The Political Junkie wrote on May 22, 2007 12:01 PM:I want to know about any flight attendant desperate enough to get in a hot tub with that fat tub of goo, let alone have sex with his ass.
And I would be worried about the hot tub water coming from the Anacostia River as opposed to the Potomac...
rea wrote on May 22, 2007 12:01 PM:how the right wing exists to "do good."
Well, they've done pretty well for themselves, haven't they?
Anonymous wrote on May 22, 2007 12:08 PM:Slimy, slithery, scaly. Hisses. Corrupts May be poisonous.
security code: snake.
PS: Bathtubs in odd places ...like the cialis ad?
ScottW wrote on May 22, 2007 12:08 PM:Who cares how he likes his meat ?
Who cares if he used river water in his hot tub ?
What I can't can't get out of my mind is the Duke butt ass naked. The guy is hard enough to look at clothed and a stewardess ?? Is that code for hooker ??
Anonymous wrote on May 22, 2007 12:10 PM:"I have to agree ordering filet mignon well done is beastly. Only one of extremely low character would do so."
Unless you are, or hang around with, real ranchers and cattlemen. Men like my grandfather cook their steaks that way (often in an iron skillet with butter).
But my grandfather would NEVER get in a hot-tub under ANY conditions.
Anonymous wrote on May 22, 2007 12:14 PM:Liberty and Justice have been fired.
Anonymous wrote on May 22, 2007 12:15 PM:Speaking of ironic code words, mine is SOAP. Enough said....ha!
powkat wrote on May 22, 2007 12:16 PM:He stole all that money to buy tacky expensive furniture and to ruin expensive cuts of meat? And let's not even go into iceberg lettuce.
What a cheap, cheezy little man!
parrot wrote on May 22, 2007 12:16 PM:Will Tom Cruise play Duke again in an updated unauthorized biopic?
fact as in "please, Joe, say it isn't so!"
Anonymous wrote on May 22, 2007 12:22 PM:Why put a tub in a river and then put the river in a smaller tub? Did he float a boat in his tub?
Couldn't get in the river nekkid I guess ... nevermind.
Security code: shame
jay severin has a small pen1s wrote on May 22, 2007 12:29 PM:Cesspool hot tub? That's nothing.
I heard he drinks from his prison toilet!
mario wrote on May 22, 2007 12:32 PM:um.
tockeyhockey wrote on May 22, 2007 12:39 PM:I really didn't need to read this.
not to harp on the details here, but there are more than a few problems with putting river water in a hot tub. first of all, even with clean, chlorinated water you get tremendous bacteria growth in the air tubes and jets. hot tubs need to be maintained much more thoroughly than pools because they are basically bacteria frapps.
so to put plain old untreated river water into a hot tub and not change it is doubly stupid. even with the best water to start, you need to keep it constantly treated with chlorine.
any man who could do this and attempt to subject his guests to this hot tub is, in my opinion, mentally ill.
bambambam wrote on May 22, 2007 12:49 PM:ew. just. ew.
cali dem wrote on May 22, 2007 12:50 PM:"Paramour" such a curious word to use in this instance...
I knew things were bad with Duke & Wilkes but I had no idea. All the trite, over-used expressions apply: "too much information" and "you could not make this up."
And, to top it all off, security code is "meat."
Mrs Panstreppon wrote on May 22, 2007 12:54 PM:Who paid off the flight attendant? She wasn't sleeping with the Dukester for free.
WB Lynch wrote on May 22, 2007 1:00 PM:Corruptlicans at play
codeword: SOAP !
David Eoll wrote on May 22, 2007 1:04 PM:"Why a Duke? Why-a no chickenhawk?"
I feel kind of funny sticking up for someone who would do such unspeakable things to a filet mignon, but he served in Vietnam, yes? Sorry, but any military service, especially in combat, disqualifies one forever from chickenhawk status.
TheOtherWA wrote on May 22, 2007 1:08 PM:My copy arrived yesterday. I haven't had much time to dig into it yet, but from an early age, Cunningham had big dreams about what he was entitled to. He was on the this path for a very long time.
And the river water hot tub? Ewwww. Money will buy a lot of things, but common sense and taste aren't on the list.
superhawk wrote on May 22, 2007 1:15 PM:Pretty good review of the book here:
http://rightwingnuthouse.com/archives/2007/05/16/congressional-earmarks-and-duke-cunningham/
Airmon wrote on May 22, 2007 1:24 PM:Security code: Wood, as in I hope there wasn't any in the tub.
Anonymous wrote on May 22, 2007 1:26 PM:Not to steal the thunder from Marcus Stern et al who originally exposed Duke's shady dealings with Mitchell Wade, but there is another book due out in July re the Cunningham caper called "Feasting on the Spoils." I was really intrigued by this blurb on Cunningham making nice with Barney Frank:
"Look, I want to apologize," Cunningham told Frank, according to Feasting on the Spoils, by investigative reporter Seth Hettena. "I may have said things to you in the past that were harsh. I shouldn't have said those, and I'm not going to say those again." (Among other things, Cunningham had baited Frank into a fight by referring, in a congressional session, to "homos in the military.")
Whence the remorse? According to Hettena, Cunningham renounced his lifelong homophobia after purchasing a yacht, the Buoy Toy, in August 2002 from Scott Schramm. Cunningham later told Schramm, "You know, I used to be very antiwomen, antigay, and a lot of things in my life have changed. And one of those big things was 9/11. That was a big part of my life. I now vote pro-gay, and it's because of you and Lee [Marcum, Schramm's then-partner]."
Cunningham continued, "I'm sure I've met lots of gay people, but I've never met two guys that, you know, were outwardly gay and ... that I would consider drinking buddies and friends and boating buddies and people I want to spend time with ... that also said, 'Oh, by the way, I just happened to be gay.'"
Cunningham was a self indulgent jerk from day 1 in office. He is the poster adult for something endemic in much of the country's populace- those folks who are proud of their racism, sexism, homophobia, immigrant hate, etc, etc. So if Cunningham could turn it around, maybe, just maybe, there is some hope for these folks too.
FDM wrote on May 22, 2007 1:31 PM:Another very minor detail... You can't siphon water out of a river onto the deck of a boat above the level of the river. You can pump it or haul it up in buckets, but water doesn't siphon up.
Tim Fuller wrote on May 22, 2007 1:33 PM:Security code Soap not to be missed.
Enjoy.
Dennis wrote on May 22, 2007 1:57 PM:While I would never dream of rushing to the Duke's defense, this excerpt, of sordid, distasteful hot tub antics, feels like a Kitty Kelly kiss and tell book. I would have appreciated a more thorough, insightful, passage reminiscent of "The Smartest Guys In The Room" or "Den Of Thieves."
nffcnnr wrote on May 22, 2007 2:07 PM:Security code: clean
Caligirl wrote on May 22, 2007 2:07 PM:Okay, now they're just messin' with us.
and Bush senior had the gaul to bitch about Marin hot tubbers.
Sullynyc wrote on May 22, 2007 2:12 PM:Just the mental picture of the Dukester's leather nutsack emerging from the stank-nasty cesspool made me retch.
brrrrr.
nitpicker wrote on May 22, 2007 2:25 PM:Oh pleasepleaseplease let me see HOT TUB: TOP GUN II in a theater near me...
Carl Gordon wrote on May 22, 2007 2:26 PM:Ah, excuse me, like present day America, I've always had this awkward and embarrassing skin blemish. It hasn't been an issue before but now that I have an official status as guardian of the gate that only you can open, I have to be concerned with public appearances. Some appear or choose to be tall and handsome, some choose to talk in similes and engage intelligent people in their nonsensical paradiddle, yet others live in the outskirts of the electrical field, far from your frame of reference. For those who wish to grow tomatoes or spin tall tales of evildoers and abstract concepts such as “liberty”, a fertile field is provided with the cautionary tale of the frog and the scorpion. Some would sup with any demonic presence if it increases wealth (and adversely, alleged respect, or so I’ve heard) and others would share a pot of beans with a man on the street or buy you a bottle of wine as you float down the gutter. And of course a lot of people just whine. There is still a time when the shine of a street light shimmers like jewels of reality in the muddy waters of a curbside gutter filled with celebrity whores and flapping of jaws.
Filth is something that some would use to distinguish one from another. There is also the keen edge of a razor. Then again there is the filthy razor’s edge that divides us all. Us all? Only a few. But amongst the best of us, those that keep a firm grip even though this half-assed roller coaster threatens to pitch our keesters into the darkness, there is a well oiled machine that ticks out the tempo of existence. A Sartreian existence that extinguishes the flame of soiled porcelain ewers (the media) whose portraiture of a fin de sicile wears too much turquoise eye makeup and too little serge. A cosmetic compass directs our energies toward a slick America, smooth as elephant snot or some primary essence that is not unlike the tallow of fatted calves, given some tight hosiery and a push up bra.
Such is the question of the cosmos. Something that Carl Sagan would ponder after many a toke on the Betelgeuse pipe, thoroughly packed and tamped with Brillo Pads and igneous rocks. I deal out a Tarot hand of deadly Knave's swords and Medusa mendacity; there betwixt the nether naves of ecclesiastical perversity and the blandishments of insurance underwriters; there we find the uber toad.
I am barely in touch and somewhat bored with what you folks call reality. The razor-blade banister awaits my flaccid buns as I slide into the present colored confusion. How else can I say it.....peanut butter is sticky, but butter is slick.
Make of it what you will
Caslon wrote on May 22, 2007 2:46 PM:Marinating in a hot tub filled with dirty river water? Yuck. I won't even swim in the ocean. It's full of fish poop.
Dr. Cygnus Paradox wrote on May 22, 2007 2:49 PM:Well, at least now we know where the source of the pollution in the Potomac was coming from . . .
jimbo92107 wrote on May 22, 2007 2:51 PM:Remember the movie, "The Magic Christian?" In it, one of the protagonists constructs a pool filled with liquid shit and piss, then throws hundred dollar bills into it. Anybody willing to jump into the pool of human waste could scoop up lots of money.
Life copies art. Jump in the pool where Duke lives!
Shadow wrote on May 22, 2007 2:57 PM:On the whole filet mignon thing, the issue isn't just cooking any old meat well done, but cooking extremely good and expensive meat like filet mignon "very well done"; it's like saying most average Americans can't go out to fancy places and order this stuff like I do every day, so please burn it and make it worth no more than a Sloppy Joe just to spite the commoners.
daCascadian wrote on May 22, 2007 3:10 PM:Trailer trash in power about sums it up
And don`t hold your breath for Top Gun Part II : The Years of Corruption
code = waste (as in what a)
"...there is an eroticism of money..." - Neue Zurcher Zeitung
Mike Valentine wrote on May 22, 2007 4:38 PM:If not for the fired Carol Lam we wouldn't have to have this very ugly picture in our heads. Duke naked in mixed company no less stewing in river soup.
Thank you Alberto Gonzales, you did the right thing, firing Carol Lam was too good for her. Somebody get Gonzales a Presidential Medal of Freedom.
William Fargo wrote on May 22, 2007 5:13 PM:Makes ya wonder what we haven't heard about in our national legislayture! Duke we hardley knew ye ya sap!Do they have filet mignon in the joint ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,ha.
Clavis wrote on May 22, 2007 5:17 PM:We always knew that Republican politicians rooted and wallowed in filth... now we have proof!
Richard L. Adlof wrote on May 22, 2007 6:31 PM:Like Swampthing . . . The naked PUKE-ster needs to wallow in its birth waters occasionally or risk extermination.
priscianus jr wrote on May 22, 2007 6:45 PM:Not that I disbelieve the story or anything, but I've got to admit I don't really get it. True, it is disgusting. But what exactly is the point of getting into a tub full of polluted water with your girlfriend in front of your fancy guests? I mean, from Cunningham's POV. Could that possibly have anything to do with sex? I mean I know there's some pretty kinky stuff out there, but I just don't get it. Maybe I'm just old fashioned. What is it, to prove to everybody that you're a bigger asshole than anyone else on the yacht? Is it supposed to be funny?
Anonymous wrote on May 22, 2007 7:37 PM:So some author wants to prsent Cunningham in the worst possible light, and has enough of the MoDo touch to do so. Why is that important to quote? Is it so that the rabble can out-do one another in expressing their horror that (gasp) a convicted felon is not the sort of person they would appreciate? This is the equivalent of "Gore wears earth-tones".
MedallionOfFerret wrote on May 22, 2007 7:40 PM:So some author wants to prsent Cunningham in the worst possible light, and has enough of the MoDo touch to do so. Why is that important to quote? Is it so that the rabble can out-do one another in expressing their horror that (gasp) a convicted felon is not the sort of person they can appreciate? This is the equivalent of "Gore wears earth-tones"--except that Gore was at least still a player, while Cunningham's out for good.
Tony Shifflett wrote on May 22, 2007 9:14 PM:This is the grossest thing I've read this year. If Cunningham, or anyone, for that matter, did this, it'd change my views of them forever. This is totally without class.
hamletta wrote on May 22, 2007 10:55 PM:It isn't the cleanest river in the world, but you can swim in it.
You can?! That's news to me!
JC wrote on May 23, 2007 12:09 AM:Is it acceptable to laugh when Duke gets a tumor from the Potomac water?
jquick wrote on May 23, 2007 8:31 AM:And just think, that "Duke" is not the only dirty congressman that is still on the hill, there are still more and they are getting richer on your money and my money. A well done fillet and dirty water in a hot tub is very typical of a man who is toast! He is were he belongs. At least the system worked right once.
Blair Z wrote on May 25, 2007 12:57 PM:White Oak isn't that expensive.
Dan Anderson wrote on June 14, 2007 5:51 PM:This story is pretty lame, and I'm disappointed.
I could care less about Duke Cunnigham's personal habits. I 'd thought this would be true muck not merely ridicule.
The Authors of The Wrong Stuff have a book website setup at http://thewrongstuff.net/
It has interesting documents and recordings, including the phone call made to Cunningham about the house deal before the story broke two years ago (June 2005)
Scarlett wrote on October 18, 2007 10:02 AM:It's the iceberg lettuce that got me.
Scarlett wrote on October 18, 2007 10:02 AM:It's the iceberg lettuce that got me.
Clavis wrote on October 18, 2007 10:21 AM:Duke Cunningham -- the Congressman that makes his own gravy!